End of My First Adventure in China

I can't believe it has been a year already! It's hard to believe it's coming to an end so quickly.  I haven't written a blog post in a long time, mainly due to the fact that I haven't had a single day off in 2 months (Summer Intensive, plus normal classes = no breaks for me).  I am writing one now knowing that I only have  6 hours left in Xianyang, Shaanxi, China, literally my first home in China.  I know I will miss this place, especially the people I have come to know as my friends.  

Sometimes I ask myself: Why are you leaving? You are comfortable here, you know everyone! Then I realize I didn't come to China to settle down, I came to China to explore and gain experiences during my travels that know one else can have except me.  Some people have worked in the same place for more than 5 years and never really went anywhere else to see what they had to offer, I won't allow myself to get stuck in one place.  China is so big, and I really do want to experience as much of it as I can.

My new city, Hefei, is about a 17 hour train ride from Xi'an.  I am also going to a whole new

province, Anhui, farther down south and more towards the east and the coast.  It will be a little warmer, sadly, but also much wetter and less cold during the winter.  It has a huge natural lake as well, so local seafood (from the lake) is caught.  Hefei is also the capitol city of Anhui, so it is a large city with a metro and lots of foreign stores and restaurants. I chose this city because I have tried out a smaller city in China and now I want to see what the bigger cities have to offer, whether it be more or less in some areas. I will be the Senior Teacher at the new school so I will be working 28 hours a week, unlike here where I worked 25 hours a week. I am excited because not only do I get paid more, but it also looks good on a resume!

One of the hardest things about leaving any place is deciding what to take and what to leave behind.  I hate packing because I hate choosing.  I had to get rid of many things that I would have liked to keep but knew I would never use anyway.  

Turns out I have too much stuff so I will have my friend ship me two things (some winter clothes and laptop case with documents in it) after I get to Hefei.  Sometimes I wish I could pack like a guy...









I have many friends here in Xianyang and I will miss them greatly, but I have learned a lot about

how the Chinese and Foreigners work. Chinese teachers usually come and go frequently and unexpectedly because of being mistreated or not being paid enough and sometimes because they are pregnant.  Foreigners have contracts which are either 6 months or a year, so after that time has passed most of them travel to someplace new like me.  No one makes decisions based off friends, they aren't going to stay for you. 

 

 A lot of times in the past I have made decisions because I wanted to be closer to my friends, but in the long run you have to do what is best for you.  After realizing stuff like that I made a decision to leave this city in order to do what I came to do, travel and explore.  Of course I want to stay, solely for my friends and my own comfortability, but I know it won't always be that way.  The Chinese teachers said that I should stay because I am a good teacher and I know they are also nervous about having new inexperienced teachers to deal with.  I will definitely come visit them, plus my friend JJ (from Arizona; we met last year when we were both applying to get certified to teach in a foreign country, so I have been helping him out by answering a lot of his questions) will be in Weinan, which is a city near Xi'an. I will go show him some good places to eat there.  





Hopefully in my new city I make some awesome friends again and meet some really nice

people.  I'm trying to keep my expectations low so I am not surprised or saddened by anything, but China always has a way of surprising you at the weirdest moments.

I will miss most of my students quite a lot and I hope I have made a difference in their lives and taught them to think outside the Chinese box and into their dreams.  Maybe when I return to this city for a visit I can see my students again and they will remember me (Chinese students have so many foreigners come in and out of their lives, that it is common for them to forget).

Being Wanted For Everything, But Being Overused Because Of It

You know being wanted is a great feeling.  At least, most days it is, but recently my school has been using me more and more and my schedule is so full it's about to burst in my face.  Before my schedule was fine; three days off, work two hours on Thursday, five on Friday, eight on Saturday and seven in half on Sunday.  Now though it's Summer Intensive so I work every day.  Sure it's not too bad because it's only 2 hours extra on Monday-Wednesday, those aren't the problem.  It's Thursday, that is the killer day.

On Thursday I usually got to teach Kindergarden at Kids Castle (a school that hired me through Aston), but the bad thing about this school is its quite far from everything.  I only teach for one hour (three classes: two classes full of 3 year olds and another class full of 4-5 year olds).  After I teach from 3-4pm I race to do promotions, which are quite far and require a taxi to get too.  The promotion is also only an hour, which usually is fine because I get to go home afterward.  But not anymore.  Now after promotions that end at 5:30pm I have to race back to school and teach a Topic Class from 6-8pm!  This means that I would have 30 minutes to get to school, print out everything, and rest.  That's just crazy (every other day is fine because I have time to breath, but my Topic Class is really popular sometimes I have 20 students, so making a lesson and being prepared takes a lot of work!) 

So I am going to ask my school if the Kindergarden classes can be given to another teacher (who isn't doing Summer Intensive and has three days off and already teaches at the school in the morning). But of course, because it's China, I have to go through six different people before I can speak to the Chinese Manager (drives me crazy sometimes).

I dislike when China overloads me with things just because I am white, the other foreign teachers are just as good as me and just as qualified.  Yes, I understand that a black man/woman going into a classroom full of Chinese babies is traumatic at first (the kids will scream and cry), but after some time the kids will realize he/she isn't going to eat them or kill them and eventually have fun with them.

Sometimes I don't think my school realizes that I am LEAVING in less than two months (42 days!) and the teachers that are here are going to be their only options for classes.  I say get them to practice now, so when the time comes they aren't making as many mistakes!

Summer Intensive: Topic Class

Summer Intensive has begun!  Summer Intensive is when the kids sign-up for the next level of classes (so if a student is in C7 they would sign-up for C8) which consists of going to class nearly every day of the week for the next 6 weeks.  So of course the Foreign Teachers must teach these classes.  As an "Experienced" teacher I was sort of asked to do Summer Intensive (because no one else wanted to come to school every day of the week, I don't blame them).  

Too many ideas, too little time and too little pay!

So, since I teach most of the upper-level classes and I am also okay with teaching in the evenings I was given the Topic Class.  Sure, Topic Class sounds fun because it has lots of freedom attached to it, no book and no exam... But sometimes freedom sucks. Now Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday of every week I teach a class from 6-8pm, of which has to have a new topic for the class.  There is no syllabus or list of topics that you have to do, so you sort of just make it up.  Creating a lesson from scratch every week is hard enough (I do that with my C12 and C13), but for every day it's really really difficult.  Luckily since I do teach the upper level classes and have also taught the Airport classes I have left over material already created to use for the Topic Class.

I arrived early for my class, trying to shake off my nervousness through talking with some Chinese Teachers. Then I was told that I need to create some materials for the class and I was like WHAT? (Literally they tell me nothing!)

So, then I began freaking out more, although they told me that today was okay that I didn't have any materials since it was the first day, but most of the parents of the students need some physical proof that their children are learning something (damn, noisy Chinese parents! You're making my life so difficult!).  So I decided for every class I will have a print out of vocabulary words I would be using and perhaps some pictures to go alongside the words.  I also prepared two notebooks for each student, one book for Class which will consist of Writing Assignment in class and Notes they take in class (marked with a C) and their Homework books, which they only have once a week because I am awesome and don't want to grade it everyday (marked with an H).  I also explained that there would be no sleeping or texting in my class and that I would know when they are doing it because I was a student not long ago and I know all the tricks of the trade (I also scared them by saying I would answer their phones in class or throw their phone out the window and were in a skyscraper). I told them if they don't do their Homework they get to wear a dunce hat for two hours or dance to Gangnam Style in front of the class.

So my first Topic Class went alright.  I was super nervous in the beginning because I had nearly 20 kids in my class who are all different ages and at different English levels, so it makes it quite difficult to teach.  Plus I have some of my fellow Chinese Teachers joining in on the class who want to learn more English, so thats an extra reason to be nervous!  I spoke too fast in the beginning (haven't been that nervous since I first began teaching almost a year ago), but as the time went by I spoke slower and got into my comfort zone, which is making the students laugh.




The first thing I did was introduce myself with a lovely Powerpoint that I made (only one slide) to show them how funny and cool I am (I probably seemed so lame!).  

Then I went over the notebooks and learned the students name (so far I know almost everyone's names! I had a SpongeBob, Siva, and Yezi which were the weird names of the day).  The Writing Assignment for today was simple: Tell me about yourself.  Your likes and dislikes. The hard part for most of them was writing 10 sentences in 10 minutes (I make them write because I get to see their English ability in writing and it shows me how well their grammar transmits from their brain onto the page - usually they speak better than they can write, but as a teacher I think doing both is important!).  I also tell the students not to use the word INTERESTING! Why? Well because Chinese love to use this word to get out of saying why they like something.  I have the students introduce themselves to the class (most Chinese are also very quiet so I told them we would practice speaking louder as well).  Some of them still used interesting and the other students laughed when my eyes got all big as a reaction.

After break we began to speak about the Topic of the day which was Jobs.  The students were very clever and knew a lot of jobs.  Some that made me laugh were Fire Worker, so I imagined someone who works with fire and Air Lady (aka flight attendant).  Then we talked about which were the highest paying jobs in

China, which is quite similar to the ones in America.  Then we discussed the most dangerous jobs and the ones that made me laugh were Sports Player (this is where I mimicked a sports player getting injured and how it's not that bad) and Pilot (bad pronunciation made me hear Toilet so I mimicked someone falling into the toilet being dangerous).  I made the kids laugh a lot.
Then I showed the students my Dangerous Jobs Powerpoint.  This consists of the 10 most dangerous jobs, including videos from online.  Some of the best ones were Taxi Drivers because I get to explain to the kids my experience of taking crazy Chinese Taxi's and they love it! I also scare them because I scream during my stories.  The other funny one is Power Line Workers because of the video I show which is from Home Alone where the bad guy gets electrocuted by the sink knobs.  And then the Truck Drivers because I show a great video of truck accidents that make all the students go, "Woah!" "OMG" "So crazy!" and of course the boys say, "That's so cool!"

At the end of the lesson I released the students and felt really exhausted, but I knew the students had fun and when my CT friends came over and helped me clean up I knew I had done an okay job.  They were also telling me how I should become an Actress/Comedian because I am so funny. My best friend also said, "You should stay here in Xianyang, you are such a good teacher.  Management is so stupid not to ask you to stay. I will talk to the leader tomorrow."  She is so sweet and when I leave I will miss her like crazy!  She also gave me a ride home on her Motobike, which I almost made us crash two times because I was laughing in fright and making her laugh because she said, "Why is the bus stopped?" and I said, "Because there is the bus stop!"  (You don't need a license to drive Motobikes!)

Today's Crazy Adventures

So today is Monday, which usually means it's a relaxing day for the foreign teachers because we just got done teaching non-stop for two days (sadly Saturday and Sunday are our busy days, so when you guys say "Yay, its Friday!" We here say, "Oh no, it's Friday.") 
Some weeks I will head to Xi'an to meet up with friends and relax in a Youth Hostel or meet some of my friends family, which is quite exciting for me.  Hostels aren't bad at all, in fact they are quite clean and you meet the most interesting people.  Example? In this picture I am with Eric, my best friend who I met in Cambodia, his two twin cousins Erin and Rachel, an Australian traveler, a European traveller and two Norwegian's having a nice vacation in China.  Where else could you find such diversity if not a Youth Hostel?  

Anyway today I awoke with only one or two plans for the day, which were 1) Go exchange currency and send money back home 2) Get medicine from pharmacy.  Easy right?  Well, of course, a lot of the time China changes things for you (sometimes good and sometimes bad).

I get a phone call this morning from my best Chinese friend, Fiona (aka FiFi), who invited me to go to lunch

with some of the CT's at this Porridge HotPot restaurant.  I, of course, said sure.  Sure meant I had to get ready in and be at the school in less than 30 minutes (I had literally woken up 30 minutes prior to the phone call).  I love hanging out with the CT's because they make conversation, I can learn some Chinese and they make me laugh.  (Honestly, I don't even like hotpot all that much but they are my friends and I was the only foreigner who was invited).  I also wore my new sandals that I bought last week.  This is one of the first times in China I have worn sandals because I was warned that China is so dirty that you're feet turn black.  When I got to school everyone asked me why am I wearing slippers and I was like "These are sandals, not slippers."  They said to me, "No we wear those inside not outside." and I just rolled my eyes because this is the second time I have gotten shoes wrong (the first time was when I bought boy tennis shoes and now I bought slippers instead of sandals).  

We all headed to the restaurant where we got a really nice booth and even got to meet the owner (If you are a foreigner most times the owners or managers of that establishment will come over to greet you).  The owner of the restaurant served us through the meal and told me about how she went to Hawaii for vacation and her son is studying in Los Angeles.  The CT's were all surprised because of the special treatment, but I told them how normal it was for foreigners in China to get this type of treatment, although for me it makes me nervous and uncomfortable at times because everyone stares at you while you're eating.  

Once the meal was over me and FiFi headed to the Bank of China, where we discovered the bank had NO DOLLARS available till Thursday.  I was devastated because I was originally going to send money on Friday but realized that I had lost my bank card (the second time I have lost it, first it was stolen with my wallet and now I think I just misplaced it).  Luckily, there was this sketchy guy listening and he said he had American dollars to exchange.  FiFi and I were reluctant so he gave me the $250 and said I could send it first and then come back and give him the RMB amount.  Me and FiFi were shocked that a Chinese man would trust us that much.  It took us awhile to agree (as both of us were freaking out about being criminals and dealing under the table ---> hilarious to watch I am assuming), but in the end I was desperate, so I took the money to the Post Office.  When they were putting the money through the checking machine, both me and FiFi were holding our breath.  Once the money cleared we both jut started laughing in relief.  As we left and started to head back to the man, FiFi told me it is very rare for someone to just give the money and trust you to return.  We found the man and gave him the money. I asked him if he worked with other foreigners and he described a few of my friends (that is when I realized this guy was who my friends called the Dollar Man).  

Side note:  seeing Man of Steel tomorrow in 3D!!! (2nd movie in China)

After the bank I walked to the pharmacy where I usually get my insulin medicine.  The lady who works there

recognizes me and always knows what I want, so it's quite easy for me.  Today, however, they told me they didn't have any (my brain was like: "What is China out of everything I need?")  Before I moved to my second apartment I went to another pharmacy where I used to live so I took a TukTuk to the other pharmacy and they still recognized me and they had what I needed (this pharmacy was the one that filmed me for a news clip, they were like "Oh! Get the foreigner in the video.  Even foreigners shop here, we are that awesome!")

All in all today was a crazy day and it's not even finished.  Every day is an adventure and that's what I love most about being in China!  2 months before I start my new adventure in Anhui Province/Hefei City, China.

Sunset in China
For more Sky pictures go to: China Sky

Chengdu - China's New Spot To Go

My Chengdu vacation has been a blast.  I travelled alone by train, which was about a 12 hour ride.  Most

people really like to take the plane because yes sometimes its cheaper and it's a lot quicker, but I like the train.  I love the experience that a train ride provides, plus I can take lots of pictures and lie down.  For my train ride I like to travel in style, I buy the soft sleeper ticket, which is 4 beds to a room (quite like bunk beds) and it has a TV, your own lights, aircon, plugs, music (optional) and a door which you can lock.  It's quite nice and overall not too expensive, especially if you don't travel during the busy holiday seasons here.  Bathrooms aren't great and smoking rules aren't always followed, but besides that I would recommend the train for a real Chinese experience (usually the people you room with are quite considerate and nice).

I had 7 days to spend doing whatever I liked in Chengdu and I have to say I got to do the majority of what I wanted to get done (at quite and affordable price which is a bonus for me).  I arrived in the morning, sadly it took me 2 hours to find my hostel (thanks to ignorant Chinese people and their lack of understanding Pinying).  

Once I arrived at my hostel (The Mix Hostel) I checked in for my 6 nights in my personal room (you can room with other people, but I wanted a private room).  The hostel has shared bathrooms, but they are quite clean and shared showering area (used by both men and women but the doors lock and they have nice shower heads).  They also have fish and a cat named Shoa Mi (which I think translates to Panda kitten). The hostel is full of travelers from around the world, so it makes it a great place to meet all types of people.  I prefer meeting Chinese because I find that most times the Chinese are nicer to foreigners than foreigners are to other foreigners.  When I checked in I signed up for a lot of trips because you don't go on vacation just to sleep, you go to actually do something.  

First thing I did was go to Mt. Emei where the Giant Buddha is located.  It was a good day to go because it

wasn't too hot, but of course it was really humid.  The Buddha mountain prepared me for the amount of stairs I would face later in the week.  I hate stairs, especially when you throw in Texas humidity.  Going to the Buddha was about a 2 hour drive where I learned my patience for China has passed all my expectations. Our driver decided he was hungry so on the way he stopped for a quick bite to eat, the other foreigners (from France I believe or somewhere over there) complained like no tomorrow.  I got out with the guy and got a pork bun.  As I was watching the others, I was chuckling inside remembering I probably would've been the same way 9 months ago, but with experience comes patience.  The mountain was beautiful and I had a blast seeing the Buddha I had seen in a previous blog that I read previously when I was still looking at coming to China.  It's nice, those moments when you realize everything you had planned a year before had come true (yay me!).  I got done with the mountain and ate some lunch and then played with a puppy and a street cat (yes everywhere I go cats are... I have been called the cat lady).  When coming back the driver made another pit stop at a restaurant, which I was like, "Damn, I already ate."  The driver disappeared into the back and the other people on the tour refused to go inside, so this time I stayed with them (I mean they brought us to a place where the menu was all in Chinese and no pictures, so that was his bad).  Again, patience is needed when you are in a foreign country where things are done quite differently.

How many panda's do you see?

Day 3 was the Giant Panda's!!! I decided to be responsible and not hold the panda because it was about 2,000RMB to do it, which was a little out of my price range.  Our tour guide was very energetic and funny, he made sure we saw the panda's while they were still eating and awake (after 10am they pretty much sleep all day).  I took a lot of pictures of the panda's, especially the babies.  I also got to see the Red Panda's, which was surprising because these little guys actually get to walk around with people.  When I first saw one go through the hole in the fence, I froze, I didn't even take a photo.  Then I was super excited and I took lots of pictures of the red raccoon looking things.  They would make great pets I believe.  I was determined to get some souvenirs, so I bought a panda key chain and two panda shirts.

"Hey what's up?"

Day 4 was a very long day.  I woke up at 5am to be ready by 5:45am, which got changed to 6:30am

(bastards!) to get on a tour bus to Qingcheng Mt., which the bus was full of Chinese (not even one foreigner), but luckily I made some friends.  Tian, was a 16 year old senior in high school who helped me all day long.  Let's just say we became quick friends. I wanted to go to the mountain but in reality, I went to three places that day.  The first place we went  was the Irrigation site, which was pretty cool because I got to cross a lot of bridges and get to know my group a little better.  I was definitely like the adopted child of the group.  Before anyone moved on they made sure of where the foreigner was (me).  Only 3 of them spoke decent English, but they discovered my listening skills were pretty good and that I could answer in basic words, so they applauded me for that skill.  Many of them thought Tian was my classmate, student or her my tour guide (we had some laughs about that).  I got to see a cool performance of how the Chengdu Irrigation system was first created.





Then we went to lunch, which was the first time I had lunch with all Chinese people, where they all stared at me.  They made sure I got enough food and watched me use my chopsticks, which they also said I was

good at.  The lunch was classic Sichuan food, luckily not as spicy as I had been warned about.






After lunch we went to the mountain, let me just first say, "SO MANY STAIRS!"  I took the cable care up

the mountain but just to get there you have to walk A LOT and then take a boat across a small lake.  The tour guide couldn't go up with us, but she left me in the care of the small group who took the cable car with me.  They looked at me like I was a piece of glass going to break.  I thought the cable car would take us up to the main attraction, but NO! more freaking STAIRS... If you are handicapped don't come to China.  They're people who will carry you up the rest of the way, but how embarrassing would that be? No, thanks! I made it to the damn top and got some pictures while I was nearly dying.  

It was getting late, so a few of us decided to head back down and that is where I met my two adopted Chinese Uncles; Purple Shirt and Blue Shirt.  They made sure I made it back down in one piece, although I did trip on stairs a lot.  They got me to where the bus was meeting us.

The next place we went was the Ancient Town, this place was my least favorite because by this time my camera was dying and my legs were near death.  I got to see some ancient golf, bowling, play ground and archery.  After our tour we were all dropped off near the People's Park, which is a really nice street with a lot of expensive restaurants. 

I was invited to dinner by this young Chinese couple with Tian.  They took us to a HotPot restaurant, where they ordered a lot of good food and a tomato hotpot soup for me (I was the only one who didn't want spicy, I kind of felt bad).  I learned they live in Shanghai and the man's English name is Michael, he is a pilot and his girlfriend she is a flight attendant (yes like a movie romance) her name is Yuka.  He is 32 and she is 21, but he looks quite young.  They paid for the entire dinner, which was quite expensive.  I love meeting new people and now I have a connection in Shanghai.

So this post is getting long, so I will write the rest in another post.

The Good & The Bad of Being a Foreign Teacher

Lately I've been thinking about how much I enjoy being a foreign English teacher in a foreign country.  Of course there are many challenges that come along with this title, but I find those challenges exhilarating, most of the time anyway.  There are some moments where it shows me that I am meant to be a teacher and there are other moments where I doubt myself (at least the teacher part).  Last semester I had a lot of doubts, but with the new term I believe I found my footing and realized my love for the kids was what made teaching so exciting for me. So now I will tell you the good and the bad things about being a foreign teacher.

Lets start with the Good:

Money:
You live like a Queen or King!

Kids Love You:
Mostly you will find that children are very excited to have a foreigner come teach them once a week.  Their

faces light up when you walk in the room, initially just because you are a foreigner and look quite different, but then it changes into, "She's my foreigner!" which makes you smile every time.

Parents Love You:
Pleasing the parents of the children is just as important as pleasing the children (usually through games).  If you don't do what the parents want then the parents will complain.  If you don't look foreign sometimes they also complain (it's China, don't question their logic).  Luckily for me all my parents seem to like me, one because I am foreign and look foreign, and two because I remember most of their children's names and I interact with them outside of the classroom as well (meaning I poke them in the ribs when I see them on the street, put my hand on their head, or just wave hello!).

Chinese Schools Love You:

I have worked at many different schools and all of them have wanted me to work their full time.  I try not to let these comments get to my head because I know it's just so they can show me off to the parents and charge them more.  Yet the comments still make you feel good.  Recently, I have been going to this middle school and the kids are wonderful.  These kids are just regular pre-teens and teenagers who have never spoken to a foreigner before, so when I walk in the kids go crazy.  Crazy excited, I mean.  Even their Chinese English teacher is very kind and whips out his/her camera to take photos of you interacting with the children. Most of the kids, after the initial excitement wares off they realize, "Oh shit, it's a real foreigner and we get to talk to her. What do I say? What if I say it wrong?"  So, in order to break the ice I tell them my name, which is Kat.  I explain that it's not Kate, but sounds just like Cat, the animal.  Then I do their cat action which is mimicking whiskers on your face.  They all laugh, thankfully.

You Can Be Funny and Goofy (Without Looking Stupid)
If I was teaching in the US and I walked into a middle school full of teens, I would try to be cool and

collected, you know?  But in China I am a goofball.  Most of my closest friends know how out-going and funny I can really be.  In China, as a foreign teacher, you are like an animal in a zoo; the more you get the visitors to laugh the more bananas you get (of course I don't get paid more, I wish!).  You may not get paid more, but it makes you popular and it makes the Chinese students laugh and have fun; breaks the ice in another way.  I have literally danced, like did robot moves, in a class full of teens (by the way they loved it).  As I look back on moments like those I roll my eyes, while my smile comes quickly because I remember all the kids who laughed.


You Get Lots of Free Stuff:

I can't begin to tell you how awesome free stuff is, even in the US free stuff was why I went to a lot of events where I ended up gaining a lot of knowledge about things I had no interest in (Oh college!). Here in China, I get free stuff or cheaper stuff just from being a foreigner, but also because I am a foreign teacher.  Most of my kids gave me presents for my birthday, which doesn't happen to a lot of foreigners apparently (I also told them it was my birthday the week before, just a little *hint hint nudge nudge*).  I expect nothing when I go places and I receive.  I have gotten many things as a "Thank You" from the children I teach or from the school administrators who are grateful that I came and interacted with their students.  I love free stuff!

Now some of the Bad:

Popularity Sometimes Bites
Being too popular can sometimes be not fun at all.  Being popular means everyone wants you.  I am a foreigner, who looks super foreign and is from America, those three combinations makes me like a shiny new toy.  I like having my breaks during the week and in the beginning of the semester I had a lot of breaks during my weekends as well (one point I even took a nap in between teaching times, oh the good days!).  Yet because of some minor set backs (meaning parents complaining and a teacher leaving) I had to pick up a lot of the slack.  My breaks got shorter and I found myself doing some things I'd never done before (like Open House).  Because of Open House classes more students started signing up, which to Aston means "Oh lets open another class in the middle of the semester, eight weeks behind everyone else's classes!" Guess who got one of those classes? Me, of course, because I was requested.  Don't get me wrong I love the students and my CT Peter is awesome, plus it's a small class (only 7 kids) so they get a lot of one-on-one time.  My Saturday is like Dooms Day.


Staring
Even as a teacher you get stared at a lot.  Parents are more curious than their children, so their stares when you walk to their child's class is like a lazer beam (Yes, the parents sit outside the classroom and wait for their child's class to be over, overprotective much? Sometimes it's their grandparents).

Personal Space

When you are a foreigner you get no personal space.  For example, when you are sitting in the office a father will come in and stand right behind you and watch what you are doing (for this instance I was grading).  Most of the Chinese have really bad halitosis, so you nearly faint when they breath on you (don't even get me started on the crowded buses and breath!).  It's not just the parents, but the kids as well.  Most of the kids they want to touch you and hug you, but for me it's ingrained to not touch children in any way or I will get shot or sued.  Here, you won't.  Why? Because the parents want their children to be close to the foreigner.  It's weird.  So, I have gotten over most of my fears and I have hugged children and picked them up and tickled them and hit them with my book (not really hard, in all honesty the kids enjoy being klunked in the head by any object, especially if it squeaks).  But sometimes, the kids swarm you.  I hate swarming by anything, so when the kids attack me for candy or stickers I get agitated.  Sure they look all cute an innocent as they come at you, but they will take you down for a sticker.  I like my personal space very much, so when a group of teenage girls come at me, to ask about Justin Bieber not about English, my immediate response is to back up.  I still get surrounded and then they want to be hugged (They were literally 14 year old girls).

Massages in China

Me and the girls getting ready for our massages!

I've been thinking about writing a lot recently due to the fact that it was my one year anniversary from my college graduation.  A lot of my posts have been reporting things I have done and updating everyone on the decisions I have been thinking about making.  So, now I will be trying to write more detailed and humor filled posts, as most of my experiences in China are amazing and quite hilarious, so they deserve more to them then the brief mentions.  This post will be looking at my Chinese massage experiences.

After one really long teaching weekend during my first semester the whole team decided to go for a massage together at this new massage place. The massage place was called the Royal Palace Massage City.  When walking in you are impressed by the beauty and elegance of the place.  You are greeted by two beautiful women dressed up in gorgeous dresses.  All the men in the front were dressed in suits and honestly made me think they were undercover agents for the Chinese government.  This was the first massage in China I had ever done so I just followed everyone else.  We all took off our shoes of which they took away and gave us room keys and flip flops.  

During this night we had three guys and three girls, so the girls all had a room together and two

of the guys got a room together and the other a private room.  The rooms were super nice, fancy beds that leaned up or dow for your comfort and a TV you could watch, free drinks and snacks, plus if you wanted to stay the night to rest you could.  You get to choose a man or a woman masseuse, so me and a friend of mine chose a woman and the other chose a male.  We opened our package of clothes and changed quickly.  Our masseuses came in two girls and one guy.  The girls were dressed very slutty...  And I don't say that lightly; stiletto heels, tight pink shirt and a black mini skirt.  That was our first clue as to what kind of massage place this was.  

See? Those clothes aren't very professional

Most of the masseuses came by the room to see us foreigners, which was sort of normal for us.  They soon brought in a big wooden bucket full of water. I could see the steam coming from my bucket and my masseuse, who was a kind of macho looking chick but still very pretty, grabbed my feet and put them into the water.  THE WATER WAS THE TEMPERATURE of HELL!  I was lucky I didn't knock her out with how fast I removed my feet.  I thought my skin had burned off.  I knew Chinese liked to drink hot water, but to burn off their skin was a new thing for me.  At the point I had yelled a lot about how hot it was and my friends were also saying how hot the water was, thank god I wasn't alone.  They brought us some other water that wasn't hot and poured it in.  After awhile I dipped my feet back in, which I don't think it was any less hotter, but that instead all of the feeling in my feet had burned away.

After the foot massage they began the actual massage, everything was going alright besides my masseuses clothes which kept not covering enough.  We were soon flipped onto our backs, one of my friends had the male masseuse and he was quite faster than mine.  I liked all my back massages before, which were by male and female masseuses, so I wasn't worried about this one.  

Then it happened.  All the pain came.  My masseuse was SO STRONG.  I was literally wiggling and grunting in pain as she was massaging me.  At that point I hadn't learned the words for "stop" or "you're too strong" or "be more gentle".  I just kept chanting "You're so strong.  Why do you enjoy hurting people! I'm in so much pain." Honestly, I don't think I would have remembered at that moment even if I did know them.  My friends were laughing at my pain, as most friends do, which for some reason we never take offense to later on because oh yeah we would've laughed too.  Then the strangest thing happened, my masseuse started laughing at me and so did the other two.  I realized she understood me and repeated my "So strong."  I wish she actually knew what it meant because she really just kept getting stronger.  The Chinese way for a massage is literally to hurt you because then they started to pinch me everywhere!  PINCHING hurts!!! I found no meaning for the pinches.  

Bowling water!!!

• Side Note: To show you how crazy some Chinese traditions for medicine or getting better are: When you aren't sleeping correctly or you're sick Chinese will smack the inside of your elbow, (that place where they take blood from you) and HIT IT HARD.  They will take turns hitting you until you bleed.  If you bleed red you are healthy, but if you bleed black you are sick (all I could think if you bleed black is that you are an alien).  I nearly fainted when I saw my CT's doing this and they saw my face of absolute horror and laughed. 

Next on the massage schedule was our thighs.  As I said earlier my friend with the male masseuse was a lot quicker than me and my other friend.  When we heard her squeal of surprise and hysterical laughter we were quite surprised.  We asked her what was wrong because her face was red and her masseuse looked confused.  

"My masseuse just touched my foofy!"  I had no idea what a foofy was till that night - means the vajayjay (well at least to my friend it does).

I was shocked, especially when I realized that me and my friend were next for that body part massage.  The masseuses were talking to each other, the poor male masseuse looked frightened.  Me and my friend immediately blocked that part ourselves and shook our heads no.  I also added in the Chinese words for "No want!"  We all then covered our breasts and said no as well.  We could hear next door the boys giggling and we suspected they also figured out what the massage really entailed.

After the massage we sat reminiscing about our experiences, while watching some lions take down an antelope.  My friends husband came into our room. he was the one who got his own private room.  We asked him how it was.  (Dialogue as best as I can remember it)

Him: "It sucked. She didn't even smile at me.  I could hardly feel anything and she was so lazy."

Foofy (Her nickname for the story): "I got violated and fondled on my foofy."

Me: "I was burned, pinched and broken by my masseuse."

Him:  "I wish I was violated.  I didn't even get a whole massage, it only lasted 30 minutes."

His wife: "Hey!" --> It's okay she got a male masseuse the next time we went :) See the picture!

The male was a better masseuse she said.

Him: "Just kidding.  I love you."

The other boys came in from their massage and told us about their similar experiences, but well the guy version.  They also told us about how they could hear us screaming and laughing through the walls.

The guys looking good!

Later on that week we learned that that massage place wasn't in a great part of town, so most of their customers come for "extra" services by the masseuses.  For some reason none of us were very surprised by this, but we decided not to go back to that place for well the obvious reasons.

The second massage experience in another place was a lot better.  We got to share the room with all the boys, which made it much funnier.  Although I still got the strongest woman and screamed a lot about how strong she was and I got pinched (it's a Chinese thing I guess).  

The added bonus was they treated us like circus people, so basically we were turned into pretzels.

See? A Pretzel!